Welcome back to the Inner Confidence Podcast! In today’s episode, our host Robbie Kramer is joined by Coralyn Jewel, a master sexologist and adult film star. Together, they dive deep into a variety of fascinating topics, including the value of personality over looks when it comes to attraction, the intricacies of the swinger lifestyle community, the evolving landscape of the adult industry, and even the intriguing world of AI and deepfakes. Robbie and Coralyn share personal stories, insightful perspectives, and offer valuable advice along the way.
Show Notes:
01:45 – Adult Star ‘Carolyn Jewel’ – Listen to her come-up story!
03:43 – From monogamy to swingers! – Learn why our guest made the switch!
05:53 – “You have to do it for the right reasons!” – Swinging is not for everyone! Learn why…
07:18 – “I need more d**K!, okay let’s swap!” – Host shares his threesome adventures and what went wrong!
09:04 – “I was only okay with relationships if it meant we would be totally open” – Host shares his experiences!
11:08 – “Out of 30 couples, 2 are left!” – Are couples that swing more likely to break up? Find out here!
13:02 – Communication is KEY! – We discuss the importance of communicating and learning when to say NO!
16:44 – “He didn’t tell me he was bisexual!!” – In the swinging lifestyle, it’s important to be transparent about your sexuality! Here is why…
20:47 – “How did you make the transition from the swingers lifestyle to the adult industry?” – Listen to her answer here!
23:14 – “How does being an adult star impact your normal sex life??” – Guest shares her experiences!
24:01 – “I don’t date anymore!” – Find out why our guest is DONE with dating!
25:08 – “The adult industry has changed so much” – We discuss OnlyFans!
27:15 – There is a difference between sex professionally in front of a camera and behind closed doors! – Listen to our guest break down why it’s important to separate the two!
27:48 – “It’s all edited!” – Porn is mostly FAKE!
28:50 – “I prefer working with the same guys” – Find out why our guest prefers working with the same guys!
29:4 – “You can be the most gorgeous man in the world, but if you have an attitude I’m out!” – Do woman care about looks?? Find out here…
33:55 – “Do you date anyone in the adult industry?” – Guest breaks down the pros and cons!
35:33 – AI in the porn industry !? – We discuss!
37:35 – Will sex robots take over?! – Listen here!
40:38 – “There is no more human interaction” – Everything is virtual, we dive into the importance of human interaction!
41:01– You’re not really talking to the girls you think you’re talking to! – Truth behind the webcam industry…
43:58 – Be open to discuss “taboo” subjects with your kids! – Guest tells us about her two kids and how she handles awkward sexual conversations!
46:14 – “I never get clients from: Italy, Spain, or France” Why? Find out here!
46:58 – Suppressing sexual behavior makes it WORSE! – Guest gives an example and explains!
50:57 – “They banned porn in India… my #1 following, is from India!” – Find out why!
52:59 – Where to find our guests and her socials: https://www.thecoralynjewel.com/
54:5 – What to watch out for when choosing a coach, therapist, phycologist, or anyone for that matter! – CHOOSE the right person!
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Transcript
Robbie Kramer [00:00:00]:
So how’d you make the transition from the lifestyle into, like, the adult world? I was only okay being in a relationship if it meant we would be, like, totally open.
Coralyn Jewel [00:00:08]:
My ex husband contacted me and told me that he found condoms in our son’s pocket, and he was very upset. And I said, I’m not if we play with a couple. No oral, no kissing.
Robbie Kramer [00:00:15]:
What just happened? My girlfriend’s, like, Bret was trying to suck your cock. And I’m like, oh, thanks for stopping that.
Coralyn Jewel [00:00:20]:
I wanted to understand more behind, like, kinks and, you know, why people swing.
Robbie Kramer [00:00:24]:
It’S so hard to detach sex from emotions. Here’s an interesting question. Have you ever thought about what the impact of AI will have on the porn industry? Welcome to the Interconfidence podcast, where we bring you men’s dating and lifestyle advice that doesn’t suck. I’m your host, Robbie Kramer, a former collegiate golfer turned poker pro turned finance guy who became obsessed with learning about male female attraction and dynamics and passionate about teaching men how to improve and optimize their love life. Tune in each week and we’ll bring you the latest and greatest strategies on how to get more dates, how to build a thriving social circle that brings the best men and women into your life, how to become a better networker, and how to design a lifestyle that makes all your buddies jealous. If you’re new to the show, I recommend you download my first Date Protocol. It’s the best piece of content I have. It’ll help you optimize your first date and subsequent dates. And I like to connect with my listeners personally, so if you want to grab a copy of that, please send me a direct message on Instagram. I’m at Robbie Kramer. Now let’s dive into this week’s content. All right, we are back with Coraline Jewell, who is a master’s sexologist, an adult film star. I came on her podcast, I think it was about a year ago. We had a great conversation, so I’m really excited to kick around some awesome ideas. You’re a master sexologist as well, so should be an interesting interview. Why don’t you tell us your story?
Coralyn Jewel [00:01:45]:
Oh, gosh, I don’t even know where to start. Let’s see. Well, I started my like, I was a I was an Olympic figure skater. Like, an Olympic figure skater hopeful for South Africa. I was born in South Africa. Raised in California. I was married, lived in various countries, coached ice skating, and then I grew.
Robbie Kramer [00:02:02]:
Up and always had a crush on the figure skaters.
Coralyn Jewel [00:02:06]:
Right. And I didn’t have a crush on the hockey skaters, but I did kick their ass on Saturday nights. It was freestyle night, and I used to charge them that I could beat them around the rink, and I went home with a lot of money. My parents used to wonder what I was doing at the time, but at that time, I was just being a good girl and just racing them somehow I was married and things just kind of I just say your life path takes you on different you get thrown these curveballs and which direction you go. And I ended up getting a degree in theatrical production, and I ended up getting a job as a director in the adult industry. And from that led to hopping to the other side, working in front of the camera. And I also somehow got involved in running wet. Dude. I was a wedding planner and then started a swingers club in 2012. Built that to about 20,000 members, and everything just kind of like turmoil until then. I decided I wanted to understand more behind Kinks and why people swing and what the pros and the cons are of that world. And that led to me going to get certification as a sexologist and then started working for Dr. Susie as an on call therapist for her. And then I wrote a book and documentary, and I’m working on my second book, and here I am. I don’t even know where I’m going next.
Robbie Kramer [00:03:21]:
That was a great sort of summation. If someone asked me, like, tell your life story in two minutes, I would have not done nearly as well.
Coralyn Jewel [00:03:34]:
It’s crazy.
Robbie Kramer [00:03:35]:
So you were basically in a traditional monogamous marriage prior?
Coralyn Jewel [00:03:42]:
Yes.
Robbie Kramer [00:03:43]:
And what made that fall apart? And why did you kind of go down this other path?
Coralyn Jewel [00:03:51]:
My husband and I were actually together for we were married ten years, together for 14 years, and we actually got involved in the swinger lifestyle community about the last year of our marriage, and that’s what ultimately ended our marriage. And so people always say to me, well, why would you stay in that lifestyle? And why would you start a club? Like, why would you start a community when that’s how your marriage ended? And it was really because at that time in my life, I felt like that was my sense of they become our friends. That was our community. We chose to do the vacations and be part of just going out with people involved in the lifestyle. And not necessarily that we were sexually involved with them, but that there was an open minded community where you could say what you want, do what you want, wear what you want, and nobody there was lack no judgment. But we didn’t have the guidance. So we didn’t know some of the rules and the etiquettes, and we communicated with each other, but some of our communication was we didn’t know. For example, we said, okay, if we play with a couple, no oral, no kissing. And then the first time that we did it, the guy goes to kiss me and I look over and I say, oh, no kissing. And he goes, but your husband’s kissing my girlfriend. And I’m like, oh, okay. And then kissing to do oral. And I was like, no, that’s another one of our rules. And he’s like, but there and I’m like, oh, okay. So then it was like, okay, saying to my husband, well, what just happened there? And he says, well, that doesn’t really work to be intimate with somebody without those things. And I’m like, all right, well, and then things like Turmold, where we would meet a couple, and we ended up being exclusive with that couple, and for me, it was just sex, and it was like, all right, get out of my bed. Great, wonderful. Give my husband back. And then with them, it was like giggling and laughing, and I was like, do you have a connection with her? Is there something I’m missing? And he’s like, You’ve lost your mind. And I’m like, I don’t think I have. It’s a woman’s intuition, and this is your chance to say to me, you know what, they do have an emotional connection with her. And he didn’t admit that. And so I found out six months later that they’d been having, like, an affair on the side. And I say affair because people say, well, but you guys are already having sex with them. Well, there’s sex and then there’s emotions. And so that was the emotions, but that’s why I stayed in it, and that’s why I started doing the counseling and stuff like that, because there’s people that turn to the lifestyle community just to save their marriage, and I tell them it’s not going to save your marriage.
Robbie Kramer [00:06:09]:
Sorry, go on.
Coralyn Jewel [00:06:10]:
No, I was just going to say that there’s people that come to it for the right reasons. They’ve been married 30 years, and they’re just looking to spice up and something exciting. And if you do it right, I call it. I say you’re playing with fire, and if you don’t know how to play with fire and you’re not learned the lessons and the rules and the etiquette about it, you’re going to get burned. But if you have the background and the knowledge of how to do this right, then you can spice up your marriage or spice up your relationship with your partner.
Robbie Kramer [00:06:33]:
Yeah, I had quite a bit of experience in the lifestyle. I started dating a girl this was, I think in 2013, about ten years ago, and we were very open. We were kind of like threesome hunting all the time. And eventually we kind of found our way over to the lifestyle lounge, the website basically, and we went to a sex party in La. And we were like, oh, this is way easier to know single girls or just to meet other open minded people going to looking online or online, right? Because we were just going around to the know. We tried to pick up girls at the gay bars because that was a great place to do it in West Hollywood. We got pretty good at it. But then she kept complaining during sex. She’s like, oh, you’re giving all the attention to the other girl, I’m like, well, she’s new, of course, but that didn’t go over so well. And then eventually she was like, I need more dick. I’m like, okay, great, well, let’s swap. So we encountered a lot of the same obstacles you guys did, but our rules were just kind of like, oh, we’ll just kind of make them up in the moment. And we were obviously green to the whole thing and we did a pretty good job of finding the right couples. Then we kind of got involved with a core group of people and they.
Coralyn Jewel [00:07:56]:
Would you find your group, they saw not your click, but you kind of find your click is what it is.
Robbie Kramer [00:08:02]:
Totally. And it was a really good crew of fun people in La. Probably like ten to twelve couples, and sometimes we’d go to the Vegas Takeover events, but a lot of the time it was just like I’m surprised we.
Coralyn Jewel [00:08:18]:
Never crossed paths up until we interviewed you.
Robbie Kramer [00:08:22]:
Yeah. So you were involved in the same time, like 20?
Coralyn Jewel [00:08:26]:
Yeah, 2012 is when I started my club.
Robbie Kramer [00:08:29]:
Okay, what’s the name of the club?
Coralyn Jewel [00:08:32]:
Well, that’s the whole attorney thing I was just telling you about before we took our interview. It was hanky panky. And now I’m called embrace. So embrace last dolly bets.
Robbie Kramer [00:08:41]:
Gotcha. Okay, so that was like your podcast because you’re the host of the Hanky Panky podcast. You’re still doing the podcast, and now.
Coralyn Jewel [00:08:46]:
It’S the Embrace podcast.
Robbie Kramer [00:08:48]:
Oh, got you. Okay. Yeah. What ended up happening to us is like well, I don’t know, it was one of those situations where when I got in the relationship, I was only okay being in a relationship if it meant we would be totally open. And I was very much about having lots of experiences, lots of variety. I had all this stuff on my sexual bucket list I wanted to check off. Not really consciously, but unconsciously, that’s what I was doing. And as time went on, we’d meet new couples, we’d both form connections, but my tendency to form connections, I think was stronger than hers.
Coralyn Jewel [00:09:32]:
Okay.
Robbie Kramer [00:09:33]:
And then that, of course, led to drama. And then we had a girlfriend for a while, and then I remember I went and cuddled with her and that really pissed off my girlfriend when I went to do that.
Coralyn Jewel [00:09:44]:
Yeah.
Robbie Kramer [00:09:49]:
It’s so hard to detach sex from meaning or sex from emotions.
Coralyn Jewel [00:09:55]:
Right. That’s the key.
Robbie Kramer [00:09:56]:
Right. And it’s like, I didn’t think, like, me going to cuddle with that girl would just totally piss off my girlfriend.
Coralyn Jewel [00:10:04]:
In hindsight, cuddling is emotion. Sticking your dick inside of her is just sex.
Robbie Kramer [00:10:08]:
Totally. So, yeah, I mean, I was an idiot, of course, but lessons learned. It was fun. I remember.
Coralyn Jewel [00:10:22]:
It’s definitely a different world of navigation, and it definitely takes a couple that’s involved in a strong relationship with strong communication. You can’t not for a second say, okay, did not like you cuddling. Not okay with that if you don’t say it. And then you keep it inside, it just builds up. Builds up. And then all of a sudden, it just comes out as I let you do this and this and this and this and this and this and that. And a lot of he said, she said, and they talk about call passes. I disagree with hall passes. I disagree with this is me. I disagree with separate room sex because I feel like you’re in this together as a couple, and you’re in this together as a partnership to experience this together. What’s the point of him going off to another room and you going off to another room and coming back and being like, yeah, that guy’s, he fucked me better than you did great.
Robbie Kramer [00:11:08]:
Yeah. What I found interesting was out of all those couples, this is ten years later, I think there’s only two that are still together. And we probably met 30 to 40 couples that we were like, These people are awesome. We love both of them. The guy girl, they were both awesome. Really cool people. But I guess with any couple, right. Most were not married. A few were okay. The two that were married are still married. Those are the only two that are together. Probably another five or six that were married got divorced, and then the rest who are just dating, all broke up. Not to say, like, if you run an analysis of just a non lifestyle couple, the ODS of them staying together are, like, less than 5% anyways.
Coralyn Jewel [00:11:54]:
Exactly.
Robbie Kramer [00:11:56]:
Yeah. Did you find there’s any correlation between well, do you find, like, couples that swing are more likely to break up versus non?
Coralyn Jewel [00:12:08]:
No, I think I find it the opposite. Again, it’s just like couples that turn to this relationship, turn to this to save their relationship, ends up not working anyways. But from what I can see in my experience, is that and this is not just in relationships. This is in the business world. As I just told you earlier, people lack the skills of communication and listening. And I think that’s the number one issue with anything and everybody. It’s in anything. It’s a waitress and you’re a customer sitting at the table, and they didn’t listen when you said no tomatoes, or whatever it may be. Right. People, they don’t listen. And I think that’s the biggest thing. And so it’s the same with the lifestyle. If you don’t listen to your partner, when your partner says, please, I don’t want us to do this. This is the one thing that I think is special between you and me. And then they go and do it. You didn’t listen.
Robbie Kramer [00:13:03]:
It’s tough because you tell a human being not to do something, and what do they do? Typically, that thing. Right. Just human nature. But I 100% agree. Communication, you have to say something in the moment. Right. You can’t let that fester. And that’s hard sometimes.
Coralyn Jewel [00:13:23]:
I always say, though, don’t be in a situation with a couple interacting with something that you don’t really want to do but you’re not comfortable but you’re not comfortable to say, hey guys, sorry. Let’s stop for a second. You wait till after the fact and then you say to your partner, oh my God, I didn’t want to do that. And then your partner goes, well, why didn’t you say something? Like, I’ll give you a perfect example. I had a boyfriend for three years. He was not in the lifestyle. I brought him in and he knew. I told him at any given point, if there’s like, a connection with somebody like what my husband did to me, say something to me. Let’s not continue this. And I remember that one night it took us a while before we never played fully like what’s called full swap with a couple until we got comfortable with each other. We were with a couple in Las Vegas and they were super cool. And we went into their hotel room, living room, hotel room, living room, hang out. And then they were cool. And then as soon as we went to the bedroom to go play, it was like Jekyll and Hyde. She was like, you two, there s here. And I remember looking at my boyfriend and being like but we didn’t say okay. We still went with it. I then remember we went on the bed, me and her husband, and they went on the other bed. It was two full size beds, so it wasn’t queens. Four people couldn’t have been on them. So I was okay with us being in the same room but separate beds. I couldn’t have been more than 3 seconds. And she just screams, I love you. And like this orgasmic sound which I mean I can make for you guys. And I remember that I was like, what just happened to her husband? And he took my cheek and he goes, don’t even look. And I go, I’m not going to look. I was like, in shock. I love you. And this scream. So we went about our thing, me and her husband, for like, 45 minutes. And it was quiet over there. And I remember stopping and looking at him and being like, baby, are you guys done? And he goes, Never started. And I’m like and he goes, Never started. And I went, okay you guys, it was really nice meeting you and we’ll see you later. And we got to go. And we got in the car. He told me that nothing happened. He didn’t even touch her. That was completely fake. Her screaming and doing that whole thing in the beginning was just a show to get his attention, which he never gave her. He told me not to look either. Took my cheek and I said to my boyfriend, why didn’t you stop me? Why didn’t you say like, hey babe, we need to go. And he’s like, well, you look like you were having a good time. And he continued to throw that at me throughout the rest of the relationship. Remember that time I let you and I was like, no, that’s not fair because I didn’t know, I didn’t want to look over at the I love yous, you have to communicate.
Robbie Kramer [00:15:43]:
What did she do after I love you?
Coralyn Jewel [00:15:44]:
She just like, he said he didn’t even touch her. He said he didn’t even hold her hand. I love you was to grab his attention. And then the screaming orgasm that she had was just to get his attention, which he didn’t give into. So we were in our own little world for 45 minutes before I was like, they’re being really quiet. And then I noticed they were just both sitting there staring at us.
Robbie Kramer [00:16:09]:
That’s so strange.
Coralyn Jewel [00:16:10]:
You have to communicate before. And also I always tell people, communicate before you go to that room. I have couples that tell me they meet a couple, they don’t really tell that couple, oh, we’re new, or over into this or over into that or whatever it is. They go to the room, they don’t realize that the male half might be bisexual. He goes to interact with the other male. The other male is not interested, but doesn’t know how to say no, goes through with it and then is very uncomfortable after the fact. Well, if you don’t tell people they’re.
Robbie Kramer [00:16:37]:
How are you supposed to know, right? Yeah, I’ve got some funny stories about that.
Coralyn Jewel [00:16:43]:
Right? You see that’s a big thing in the lifestyle. It’s totally fine for the woman’s profile to say bisexual, but God forbid a man’s profile says, my husband’s bicomfortable or bisexual. People like say, oh no, and it’s like, I guarantee you your husband’s bisexual or bicomfortable as well. He just doesn’t put on profile.
Robbie Kramer [00:17:03]:
Yeah, we had a birthday party, I think it was my 32nd birthday or 31st, whatever, and one of the couples who came was actually my ex girlfriend, and she brought this guy who was bisexual, but we didn’t know he was bisexual. And at one point I think my girlfriend plus her plus another girl were like going down on me and then all of a sudden I see someone’s head thrown across the room and I’m like, what just happened? My girlfriend’s like, Bret was trying to suck your cock. And I’m like, oh, thanks for stopping that. Yeah, the way it was phrased by I think it was by my ex was like my other ex. So my current girlfriend, who’s now my ex, obviously, and the other ex, she was like, does anyone want a birthday blow job? I was like, sure, but I think she said, we’re going to give you a birthday blow job. And I thought that meant like her and my girlfriend and the one other girl, but apparently it meant we as in me and my guy, anybody that.
Coralyn Jewel [00:18:03]:
Wants to get involved.
Robbie Kramer [00:18:05]:
Exactly.
Coralyn Jewel [00:18:06]:
The thing is, just between you and me and everybody else who’s listening, I’m sorry, but only a man knows how to please a man the best because you know what you like and vice versa with a woman. So the problem is if you go there, you’re going to be like, fuck, this is not bad, actually.
Robbie Kramer [00:18:20]:
Then you cross that line and then you’re like, well, let’s now that was just a line I didn’t really want to cross. I agree. I think a man probably would be much better than that, given you have one. Right. There’s no way I’m as good at licking pussy than a woman because I don’t have a clit.
Coralyn Jewel [00:18:41]:
Right, exactly. No, it’s true. But again, that’s a door that luckily, somebody else stopped that before you have enough to make him feel uncomfortable and say, hey, man, sorry, just not my thing.
Robbie Kramer [00:18:54]:
Exactly. Yeah. I was in another situation like that at Burning Man where the guy was bisexual, but he at least asked and asked me if I was comfortable after we had kind of swapped, and I was like, no, it’s not really my thing. But they approached that. Right. But yeah, it’s tough because when you’re dealing with sex, it can get awkward. So if you ask or you stop things, you feel like you’re killing the vibe.
Coralyn Jewel [00:19:19]:
Right. But you have to and I always tell people, I always say, if you’re in this moment with another couple, you’re grown adults, so just your body. You have the authority and the right to say, hey, listen, you guys, we apologize. We’re sorry. It’s nothing against you or us. It’s just that this is not going to work or this doesn’t feel right, and you don’t need to go into the details of why or what’s going on between you and your partner. I always say, don’t go into the drama. It’s enough to say, we truly apologize. We’re going to stop. That’s it. Because that’s all you have to say. You don’t owe anybody an excuse of giving them your backstory of, well, the reason is blah, blah, blah. Who cares? Okay? Not going to work.
Robbie Kramer [00:19:59]:
I found the lifestyle to be, like, a really interesting period of growth for me as a guy in my mid 30s, early 30s, just because it forced me to communicate a lot more. It forced me to have boundaries and stick to boundaries and, yeah, it was a great period of growth, and I was very thankful for all those. Now I feel like if my partner was interested in it, I’dabble but I kind of felt like I got those things out of my system, I guess you could say.
Coralyn Jewel [00:20:26]:
Yeah, it’s kind of know when they say you get your party out and your like, we were just in Vegas last week and me and a bunch of girlfriends, and my one girlfriend was like, we’re going clubbing, and I’m like, the rest of us really aren’t feeling this. And she’s like, come on. And so we went, and two of them are up, know, having a great time, and the other four of us are outside going like, how do we get out of here? How do we nicely say, we want to know. You’ve done it. You’ve done it. You’re over it.
Robbie Kramer [00:20:48]:
Totally. So how’d you make the transition from the lifestyle into the adult world?
Coralyn Jewel [00:20:55]:
That was kind of simultaneously? I try to look back on it. Okay. I was divorced, and when I got divorced, we had been already dabbling in the lifestyle. And so I got a job working at a club as a door girl to make some money at one of the clubs that we used to go to when I was married. That led to meeting someone there who said, you should do modeling. So then I started modeling. Modeling led to a photographer asking me if there was any location I knew of that was a nightclub environment that we could shoot at when they’re not open to the public, which led to me getting on Facebook, and a friend of mine saying, hey, Dino from high school owns Expose. At that time, we didn’t know, but so we went down there, me and my photographer, and he pulled up, and I go, this is a strip club. And he goes, did you know that? I didn’t know that. And so we go in, and my photographer saying, Get on the pole. And I’m like, I don’t know how to get on the pole. And he’s like, you can’t get on the pole? And I’m like, no, I was an ice skater. I’ve never a stripper. And I was 36 years old. And so at 36 is when I started modeling. At 36, I was modeling, which led to the owner of the club, who was a friend from high school, saying, you should dance here. And I’m like, I can’t dance here. I’m 36. And he’s like, you’ll make $800 a day. And I’m like, I can dance here. Where do I sign up? That’s how it happened. I started dancing. That led to me getting on the site called Sexy Jobs. That led to me getting a job as a porn director, then crossing over to the other side because the male talent said to me, how many times are you going to write a check to these girls that can’t do anything right? And I’m like you’re right. I can do better than them. So then that’s how it came over. And then from there, things just kind of turmoil.
Robbie Kramer [00:22:32]:
You were a director before an actress.
Coralyn Jewel [00:22:34]:
Yes. It’s the total opposite. Yeah. Director, camera girl, production assistant. I did all that first.
Robbie Kramer [00:22:40]:
Really? Okay. So when you did become an actress, did that change anything about sex for you? Because I actually have a lot of friends who are porn stars, a lot of girls from I used to live in Ukraine, as you know, and a lot of girlfriends of mine that live there eventually kind of made their way over to Budapest. I’m also friends with Julia Grande, who kind of runs like Vixen and Blacked, and that whole operation is, like, one of the biggest porn operations. I’m always curious, what does the impact of being an adult star have on your normal sex life?
Coralyn Jewel [00:23:21]:
You really have to have this. It’s interesting because for me, I can really separate it. That is his job. I am showing up. What are we shooting? How long is it going to take? What positions? Where’s the pop? Okay, how much content do you need? And done. I’m sorry to say, but my mind at that time is like, okay, I’ve got to get the kids home from school. I still have to get them over to soccer practice. I’ve got to get dinner, I’ve got to get laundry, I’ve got to get to the bank in time. That’s your job, and it’s just your regular day. Whereas anybody that I dated during that time, at first it was like, oh yeah, you’re a porn star, is totally fine with that, no problem. But then there was a problem with it, and they can’t understand that. We can separate. I can definitely separate, but I don’t date anymore. Like, I just decided I just don’t date anymore. And I even tried to date somebody not too long ago, and I was like, yeah, no, I can’t do this, so this doesn’t work.
Robbie Kramer [00:24:12]:
So when you say don’t date, you mean like, you’re just perpetually single?
Coralyn Jewel [00:24:16]:
I’m single, yeah, and I won’t date ever again.
Robbie Kramer [00:24:18]:
Really?
Coralyn Jewel [00:24:19]:
Yeah.
Robbie Kramer [00:24:21]:
No love for you.
Coralyn Jewel [00:24:22]:
It’s going to take a real good man to change my mind about the male species, I’m sorry to say, but I coach in this world. I teach, I do seminars, and it’s going to come back to exactly what I say. Communication is just pathetic, and it’s awful. It’s awful, and it’s going to take somebody that’s going to blow my mind, and I’m going to be like, wow, you really did hear what I said. Or you really are listening.
Robbie Kramer [00:24:48]:
Wow, that’s so interesting that you’ve come to that place.
Coralyn Jewel [00:24:51]:
I have, yeah.
Robbie Kramer [00:24:55]:
Are you still acting at all? Are you having sex?
Coralyn Jewel [00:24:58]:
Yeah, but it’s for money. I shoot, so it’s for my scenes and it’s hard to explain. The adult industry has changed so much. It’s not really about having an agent anymore or having a manager anymore. It’s really more about these different platforms where you have subscription page. Well, only fans can shove it in their ass, and I hope they hear this. I hate them. I wish that your listeners would not support that platform. They are awful. They made their success off the adult industry. As soon as they did that, they were ready to throw us to the curb. Now we’re back again. Because they realized, holy crap, they bring in a lot of money. I canceled my only fans page, which is a nightmare in itself. They make it impossible to close your page. And if you go and you Google only fans complaints, you’ll find over 5000 complaints of people saying saying, I couldn’t fight anymore for my $40, my $80, my $20. And I’m like, well, that’s how they’re rich, because there’s all you guys that I got my money back. It was a pathetic amount of, like, $110, but I fought until I got it. But they’re impossible. But there’s tons of platforms out there, like, loyal fans, many vids fansly. There’s a bunch of others that are they’re there for the adult industry, and they support us, and so we should support them. Nobody should support OnlyFans I swear.
Robbie Kramer [00:26:13]:
Remember when they tried to kill the adult sector? And I’m like, that’s not going to work. That’s like how you guys became huge. It’s so fucked.
Coralyn Jewel [00:26:23]:
They are they are awful. And then if you look at any complaint form or reviews or whatever, it’s always their same answer. It’s their little bot with their stupid we’re sorry, we’re unable to locate your information. I just got an email today that says, thank you. We have closed your OnlyFans account. Really? Because I asked you guys to do that six months ago. Like, it just did it. They’re awful. They’re awful.
Robbie Kramer [00:26:45]:
Sure. They’ve got almost no support. That’s what I hate about all these.
Coralyn Jewel [00:26:48]:
Big, terrible, terrible, terrible, terrible company.
Robbie Kramer [00:26:50]:
So I had a couple more questions before we dive in more into the Only fans, all the adult online content. Now, did you notice any sort of, I guess, transition with your relationship with sex? Did you feel like getting into adult entertainment made sex better for you? Made it worse. Do you enjoy having sex on camera versus with a partner?
Coralyn Jewel [00:27:22]:
Yeah, no, I can definitely differentiate. I think that being in the adult industry at the time, it was like going home and trying things with my boyfriend or my partner and being like, hey, look, we tried this today. Let’s see if we can do it. But you really have to be able to separate that. That’s your job. People don’t understand. Even today when people talk to me, they’re like, well, I don’t know if I’m going to be able to perform. What your porn scene that you did with it? I’m like, Listen, that’s all edited. Do you think that we really go exactly like you’re watching? No. Usually some times we have the pop shot right away. Then we go and do the scenes, and then we’re done. Sometimes you guys think that the pop is right away? No, the director is eating pizza. I’m playing on my cell phone. He’s jacking off in the corner until he’s ready to pop, and then he comes up with rolling. Okay. It’s not what you guys see.
Robbie Kramer [00:28:10]:
I think that’s why amateur sex for guys.
Coralyn Jewel [00:28:13]:
Yeah, exactly. That’s what I try to explain to people is that especially, like, people that are young, like 21, 22, don’t think that what you’re seeing in porn is actually sex. It’s not. Unless you’re watching, like, a scene where somebody I can say that most of my scenes, they are stop and go and take breaks and do this. Unless it’s somebody that I’ve shot with, like J. Crew. And we have such a connection together as know, and he’s got his wife and his family, and we show up, we do our scene, and the director won’t stop us unless he says, I’m going to stop you only if I need to. Otherwise, just do your thing. You have to be able to have that connection and be able to work with your talent.
Robbie Kramer [00:28:52]:
You prefer to work with the same.
Coralyn Jewel [00:28:54]:
Guys that you’re obviously I prefer to work I do, because I feel like we can establish it’s very believable if somebody goes and watches my scenes with Jay. Those are believable scenes. If you go and watch my scenes with some of the younger guys. Although those are some of my more popular scenes, like with Juan Cabero. Those are my popular scenes because people like that whole MILF dynamic. That MILF and little young talent. I will say dynamic. I almost had little boys, but it’s not the dude that they’re of age, so it’s crazy.
Robbie Kramer [00:29:27]:
So when they’re casting, you obviously get to choose beforehand. Really? So sometimes you’ll show up and there’ll be some guy.
Coralyn Jewel [00:29:36]:
Yeah. No, I don’t think I’ve never gotten to choose. Ever? No.
Robbie Kramer [00:29:40]:
Has there ever been a situation where you’re like, I’m really not attracted to him, but I have to shoot with him, so I’m just going to suck it up and do it?
Coralyn Jewel [00:29:46]:
No, not really. Because I’m very much not about your looks. You can be the most gorgeous man in the world, and if you have an attitude within, like, three minutes, I’m out. I am a huge personality thing. I’ve had people at my swingers events. I’ll never forget this. A couple shows up at my party. They say to me, you run the hell you run such good parties. The energy is good. You’re a great hostess. You’re going to do so good if you make sure that that couple like that those kind of people don’t come to your events anymore. And I went I’m sorry, what? And they go, Them right there? And I go, no, I see who you’re pointing at. I just want to make sure you’re saying, that gentleman right there, and that lady right there. And I’m not going to describe them here because that’s how well known they are. Okay. And they said, yeah, you can’t have it. I go, oh, okay. Well, you see, he’s a surgeon, and she’s a respiratory nurse. And I’m going to show you the door because those are two of the nicest people I’ve ever met. In my entire life. And to me, it’s like, the looks will take you this far, and then from there, you better have a personality. And so the only thing with showing up on set is like, they’ll tell you before, okay, you are scheduled to shoot with so and so. I’ll google so and so and see, okay, who have they shot with? Get a little bit to know who they are about them so that I can connect with them when I get there. But I don’t think I ever get to choose. I’ve never gotten to choose, I don’t think.
Robbie Kramer [00:31:05]:
Yeah, I’ve really seen that in my own experience and experience of all my clients. It’s like the only women who really care about looks are just incredibly inexperienced or really young or really green. Once you’ve had some sort of life experience, it’s personality all the way. For guys who come to me, and they’re like, oh, I’m too short or I’m too bald or I’m too fat.
Coralyn Jewel [00:31:26]:
And I’m like, well, let’s fix the.
Robbie Kramer [00:31:27]:
Things you can fix, right? You can fix the bald. You can fix the fat, you can’t fix the short.
Coralyn Jewel [00:31:34]:
But that’s the thing, is that guys need to know that you’ve got to bring something else to the table. And I think the number one thing that you can bring honestly, communication. Listen, somebody yesterday, a guy brought me as a gut, he brought me chocolates. And I was like, how did you know I like chocolates? He goes, I read your profile. You said the three ways to your heart chocolates, coffee, and massage. And I was like, he’s listening. You read said I didn’t know what kind of chocolates you didn’t specify. So I brought a whole board. There’s strawberry. Oh, I have so much chocolate in my refrigerator now. Yeah.
Robbie Kramer [00:32:06]:
So he was listening.
Coralyn Jewel [00:32:08]:
He listened.
Robbie Kramer [00:32:09]:
If he keeps listening, then, hey, maybe and read.
Coralyn Jewel [00:32:12]:
Like, if you guys are meeting somebody on a dating profile, read their profile and write on your profiles. Don’t write about your kids, please. That drives me crazy, too.
Robbie Kramer [00:32:24]:
Well, I was watching a study the other day that said that men who if you talk less than 80% on the first date sorry. If you let the woman talk 80%, at least 80% on the first date, you’re going to have a way better chance of having a great first date because that way you remain mysterious. She gets to fill in the blanks about you. The guys I always see struggling with dates are the ones who show up, and they’re just talking about their job all the time, or they’re talking about them. It’s like, shut up, dude. Just let her talk. You listen.
Coralyn Jewel [00:32:55]:
Yeah. And talk about not even so much personable stuff, like personable stuff, but more like, what’s on your bucket list? What do you like to do for fun? That’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done, stuff like that. I think I told you I tried to go, I tried to date somebody. I don’t think he listens to anything because I don’t think he knows anything about me because he never listens. But I tried to date him, like regular dating. And all I hear about the entire time, whenever I’m is his son and the son’s sports activities and this game and that game and this baseball. And it’s like, bro, I have two kids too. My kids are my fucking world. You mess with my kids, I’m going to freaking beat your ass. But I don’t talk about them all the time. I love them. They’re my kids. But nobody else cares all the details. You know what I mean? And so that guy continuously tries to message me, hey, do you want me to stop messaging you? You want me to stop reaching out? And it’s like, listen, I don’t dislike you. I don’t wish anything bad upon you, but I definitely can’t sit through another dinner with you. There’s no ways. No fucking ways.
Robbie Kramer [00:33:57]:
Did you ever date anyone in the adult industry?
Coralyn Jewel [00:34:01]:
Yeah, I actually used to say, don’t date in the adults industry. But part of me thinks that really we’re the only ones that get each other.
Robbie Kramer [00:34:09]:
It seems like you kind of have to.
Coralyn Jewel [00:34:13]:
Definitely I would. There’s not anybody that I have come in contact with yet that I want to, but I think I would. But I mean, most of the male talent, they’re really my good friends. J. Crew is like a really good friend of mine. Dick Chibbles, who’s retired now, him and his wife, they’re really good friends of mine. I’ve really established a connection of friendship with them.
Robbie Kramer [00:34:38]:
Yeah, the successful couples I know in the adult industry are in the industry. Ariana Marie, I know her. I met her at a Vegas event. And her husband is like an agent. I don’t know if they’re still together. I don’t really speak.
Coralyn Jewel [00:34:53]:
Yeah, I don’t know. And the industry has changed so much, it’s really kind of sad. It used to be you would have an agent and you would be taken to the production studios and you would do what’s called a ghostie, and you’d be taken in and introduced. And this is Coral and Jules. She’s the new milk. Blah, blah, blah, blah. And now the ghosties are done. Agents are pretty much nobody really contacts the agency because a lot of people self book. A lot of the production companies are closing because if they pay you to shoot and then they put their stuff up on their website, it’s just being pirated. And it’s changed.
Robbie Kramer [00:35:29]:
Right. And now everything’s moving to only fans and all those other sites like we talked about.
Coralyn Jewel [00:35:33]:
Right.
Robbie Kramer [00:35:34]:
Here’s an interesting question. Have you ever thought about what the impact of AI will have on the porn industry?
Coralyn Jewel [00:35:40]:
Just going to tell you about that. Yeah, I actually just started working for a company. I’m an ambassador for them. It’s called deep fakes. And about a year ago, he contacted me. I actually met him at a it’s a I say reunion. It was a networking event only for industry, so no fans. So it’s like miniature golf one day or race cars. Know, we had poker night, and it was in Arizona, and I met this gentleman there who was telling me about this Deepfakes and AI. And I’m like, is it like Dungeons and Dragons? Like, you create your own character? And he’s like, I wouldn’t really call it Dungeons and Dragons, but okay. And I said, why would anybody spend money to create a fake fantasy woman that they can’t do anything with? Right? She’s not real. And he says, oh, no, people will. They will. And I go, okay, yeah, good luck with Know. And I let it go. Well, sure enough, that’s what he’s doing now. And he’s contacted me and Know, you can join the site, and people can take Coraline Jewel’s image, and then they can enhance it or whatever how they want you to be. So I joined it, and I’m on it. And it’s very interesting. Know, from what I understand is like, now you don’t need to hire a model for a billboard. You just create your AI model of exactly what you want, and there’s your perfect model on the billboard. Or it’s going to come to where we’ve been talking about it with porn. They’ll be able to do pornography scenes with two fake eye characters or whatever it may be that aren’t even real. But a lot of fans have told me that they don’t want to see that’s. Just like how amateur porn has become more popular than regular porn because people want to see what they can relate to, and they’re not going to relate to perfect humans or perfect fate.
Robbie Kramer [00:37:14]:
They’ll be able to tell the difference.
Coralyn Jewel [00:37:16]:
Yeah, it’s really crazy. I don’t know. I’ll try to pull up one picture while showing my kids yesterday, the AI characters, and they are like, I have no legs, and my arms are in my shoes.
Robbie Kramer [00:37:28]:
It’s the weirdest. Do you watch the series Dave, by any chance?
Coralyn Jewel [00:37:35]:
No, I don’t watch TV.
Robbie Kramer [00:37:37]:
It’s about Dicky. And I also almost never watch TV. But the rapper Lil Dicky, and it’s a really interesting show because he gets into a lot of social commentary. And one of the scenes is he orders this sex doll, but he designs it himself. And it’s as heavy as a real human.
Coralyn Jewel [00:37:59]:
Right.
Robbie Kramer [00:38:00]:
It’s a kid’s perfect everything, right? And it’s like, pretty soon that thing will become a Droid, and that Droid will be able you’ll be able to have sex with robots.
Coralyn Jewel [00:38:10]:
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
Robbie Kramer [00:38:12]:
That could be just a few years away. We’re not even talking like it’s we’re close.
Coralyn Jewel [00:38:17]:
I mean, we were talking about this the other day. It’s going to have such a different honestly, forget dating anymore. You could just create your robot, your robot does exactly what you wanted to do. There’s no arguing anymore. There’s no fighting, and you have the perfect I don’t think it’s a bad idea. Okay, let’s see. Can you see that? You see my feet?
Robbie Kramer [00:38:37]:
Yes. Wait, are you attached to, like, a motorcycle there?
Coralyn Jewel [00:38:42]:
I’m on a motorcycle, but look, I have no legs. Let me see if I can pull that in here. Look, that’s my leg stump. Do you see the stump?
Robbie Kramer [00:38:51]:
Yeah.
Coralyn Jewel [00:38:52]:
Okay. Those are my whatever. A stump. It’s the weirdest thing. That’s my boots. Yes. So that’s like, one of the characters they made you see them? Is that crazy?
Robbie Kramer [00:39:09]:
What’s going on in that one?
Coralyn Jewel [00:39:10]:
Well, what happened to my nipple? Can you show nudity?
Robbie Kramer [00:39:13]:
Yeah.
Coralyn Jewel [00:39:14]:
It’s not really nudity because I don’t really have a nipple. But what happened there now, I showed not that one to my kid, but I showed this one to my kids. And my kids, they thought that was really me. It’s not me. I mean, it is me, but it’s not me. So this is what it’s coming to. But yeah, I mean, these blow up dolls, or whatever you call them, there’s these ones, they’re called Only Dolls. Only Dolls. I think they’re and they were going to make a coral and jewel doll. And it talks. It does everything, but it does exactly what you program it to do. Yeah, I think it’s perfect. I could have a man that’ll listen.
Robbie Kramer [00:39:53]:
Yeah, there you go. There’s so many guys that are like the I think it’s now that 30% of men, like 30 and under aren’t having sex at all.
Coralyn Jewel [00:40:05]:
Oh, really?
Robbie Kramer [00:40:07]:
Don’t quote me on those numbers. But it’s a huge percentage. And the percentage of men having a lot of sex is like the guys at the top are having way more sex, and the guys at the bottom are having way less. And those are the guys that are spending money on Only Fans, and they’re essentially paying for a connection that they think is real, but is obviously fake. Right, right. That’s the reason why Only Fans is, I think, so popular and all these other sites. It’s because it’s like you have these lonely guys that are behind their computer.
Coralyn Jewel [00:40:39]:
That’s the thing. People are so there’s no more human interaction. It’s all behind your computer. It’s like all this webcamming. I personally think that the only fans and all these platforms, they’re going to go they’re going to be gone soon. Okay, but the porn industry is also going to be gone soon. What’s going to stay webcamming? I think webcamming will stay for a long time because that’s your only real.
Robbie Kramer [00:41:04]:
So I’m sure you’re familiar with Andrew Tate. Like, he made his money by having all of his webcam models, and he would chat with the guys. Obviously, he was versed in psychology and how to maximize them sending gifts and cash.
Coralyn Jewel [00:41:18]:
Exactly. Yeah.
Robbie Kramer [00:41:19]:
So it’s like these guys are thinking they’re chatting with the webcam girl.
Coralyn Jewel [00:41:23]:
But by the way, you’re not even when I’ll be honest with you, I had a manager. He was handling my only fans. By the way, you’re chatting with him. You’re not chatting with me. And I hated it, and I fired him. I got rid of him because he would write things to these guys. That is not something I would say. So on my FetLife account, he was handling that and he would write, oh, dear, please follow. I can only chat over on my only fans. And I’m like, I don’t talk like that. I don’t say, oh, dear. Okay, I go, I don’t have time to fucking chat here, okay? You want to talk to me, go over to my only fans, whatever it is. So I got rid of that. But I’m going to tell you that 99% of the time, when you think you’re writing these girls, sorry to tell you and I’ll rid of everybody. You’re not talking to us. You’re talking to all everybody’s on a manager now. I got rid of it. I was like, no, you’re talking to me. And when I write on loyal fans, I don’t have time to write you guys. That’s my biggest thing, is because I don’t have time to write you guys because I’m actually handling everything on my own, right?
Robbie Kramer [00:42:17]:
From your standpoint, that’s a huge revenue loss. Because there’s guys willing to chat, willing to pay, right?
Coralyn Jewel [00:42:26]:
Oh, yeah. I took the loss because when I had him managing it for me, I didn’t like the answers that he was. I didn’t like the way he was writing to my guests. And then he would write me and say, I’ve just blocked this person, or I’ve just deleted this person, or I put this person on in time out. I was like, what are we, ten? You’re putting my fans on timeout. I don’t want you to do that. I’m done.
Robbie Kramer [00:42:48]:
Well, pretty soon, you could already program chat GPT to write in your style.
Coralyn Jewel [00:42:54]:
Oh, yeah.
Robbie Kramer [00:42:55]:
And you could have the AI write all of that.
Coralyn Jewel [00:42:58]:
That’s scary, too. I mean, think about the journalism world now and everything. It’s really scary. We were playing with that the other day. We were playing with the whole chat TV, like saying, okay, we want you to write a letter that says this and that’s, out it comes. And you’re like, okay. Crap. Wow. Yeah, we were talking about this with my kids yesterday. They don’t even learn cursive anymore in school. That’s not even a class anymore. You don’t even learn cursive.
Robbie Kramer [00:43:20]:
I was trying to write incursive the other day. I couldn’t remember how to do A-Z-I.
Coralyn Jewel [00:43:25]:
Don’T remember how to do a z either. I looked at no, I really can’t remember. No. Because unless it’s in your signature when you sign your name. And I don’t have a z, right? But my son, the youngest one, he was like, Cursive we didn’t do cursive. And the older one’s like, yeah, I know. They stopped it when he was in fourth grade. I was like, oh, my God.
Robbie Kramer [00:43:45]:
Wow.
Coralyn Jewel [00:43:46]:
That’s what’s happening. Soon it’s going to be you don’t have to write, you just have sex with robot. I have two boys.
Robbie Kramer [00:43:52]:
And how old are they?
Coralyn Jewel [00:43:54]:
19 and 16. Almost 1616 soon.
Robbie Kramer [00:43:57]:
Nice. So are they sexually active? Can you talk about any of that?
Coralyn Jewel [00:44:01]:
16 year old? No, I don’t think so. 19 year old was probably still might be. I mean, he’s moved on to college now, but I’m very open with them. So, like, I would say to him, is your girlfriend at the time she on birth control? And he says, no, because she doesn’t want to get fat and moody. And I said, Let me tell you what’s going to make her fat and moody is pregnancy. Let me tell you what else is going to make you moody. It had me as a grandma. Not a happy grandma, but I’m very open with them, with both of them on everything. Just come to me. Ask me any questions. Tell me what you want. My youngest son writes music. He’s brilliant. He’s never had a lesson. Creates and produces all of his own music, has taught himself all of instruments. He’s really good. And the rest of the family goes, how come he only sends his music to you? Like, how come you get to hear it before the rest of us? And I said, Because I’m the only one that will give him honest criticism and feedback so that he can then perfect it and then send it to everybody.
Robbie Kramer [00:44:52]:
It’s hard to find. It’s really hard to find.
Coralyn Jewel [00:44:54]:
Yeah, you have to be honest. Communication is key.
Robbie Kramer [00:44:58]:
Right? It’s really cool that you have that relationship with them and those open lines of communication. Has the 19 year old ever brought a girl home?
Coralyn Jewel [00:45:08]:
Oh, yeah.
Robbie Kramer [00:45:08]:
Had to.
Coralyn Jewel [00:45:09]:
Well, my ex husband contacted me and told me that he found condoms in our son’s pocket. And he was very upset. And I said, I’m not I’m glad that he has condoms. However, I said, I’m very upset that I think he’s having sex with a car. So I asked him, I said, I understand that you have condoms in your pocket. And he’s like, I don’t want to talk about it. I already got yelled at. No, no, I just want to know if we’re having sex in a car. I don’t need a police officer calling me and saying that you’ve gotten in trouble for sexual misconduct out of the car. I’d rather you do it in the house, please. Like, for know, I wish my parents.
Robbie Kramer [00:45:36]:
Said that I used to have sex in my car all the time.
Coralyn Jewel [00:45:38]:
I had a big the more strict you are with this whole thing with this is why I think still Europe is way ahead of us in America is because we still condone it as like, OOH, sex. And it’s not good and don’t do know. So you make it such a bad thing that people sneak around and look, my son’s girlfriend didn’t want to talk to her parents about it, and I can’t take her illegally. I could not take her to go and get birth control from, like, a Planned Parenthood. She can go on her own, but I can’t take know and she can’t talk to her parents. If you don’t talk to your kids and have communication. Oh, shocking communication again. There it goes. See?
Robbie Kramer [00:46:17]:
Well, if you look at the cultures that don’t have as many sexual problems and the interesting thing for me is I almost never get clients from Italy, Spain, or France. And why do you think that is? It’s because those are very progressive sexual cultures, and they teach at a young age. They make sex, okay? You can drink, you can have sex. You can do these things. You can go nude to a beach and have your tits out. It’s like not a big deal, sex.
Coralyn Jewel [00:46:43]:
You don’t make it a big deal. Yeah, exactly.
Robbie Kramer [00:46:46]:
But yet those guys never need coaching. They don’t need help. They understand women. They understand sex. I mean, obviously I’ve had a couple clients over the years, but the majority of my clients are always from countries that was once ruled by the British Empire, which is.
Coralyn Jewel [00:47:04]:
I think I’ve told the story on my podcast about one of my seminars where everybody left the room and there was a young man in the back crying. And I walked over, and I was like, I’m so sorry. Did I say something? And he says no. I’m a Jehovah’s Witness, and I’m 25 years old. I still live at home. I saw the billboard. I’ve never been anything like this. I think I’m gay. I don’t know who to talk to about this. And I thought maybe I could get my answers here. And you’re the first person that I’ve heard openly speak about stuff and living your life for you and stopping the judgment. And my mom just called me and told me she found out I’m here. I cannot go home. So I said, your mother has just told you? Your blood mother has just said because you came to no nudity nothing. Because you came to an exhibition where you can learn about different things in the adult world or whatever, you can’t go home. I gave him my phone number, and I said, if you go home and she doesn’t let you in the door, you call me. I was so pissed. And as time I actually met him a year later, a year later at the same show, he shows up at my booth, and he says, do you remember me? And I looked at him, and I’m like, My Jehovah’s Witness? And he’s like, yes. And I was, like, hugging him. I was so excited to see him. But it’s like the religion and all this sex is bad and this is bad. You’re just making people take the absolute opposite direction. If anything, religion, my parents used to tell me, as long as you’re under my roof, you will go to synagogue and you will be Jewish and you will do this. Okay, fine, as soon as you turn 18, you don’t have to do it anymore. The minute I was 18, I was like, fuck you, done. And they shouldn’t have done that. And they did apologize later. What?
Robbie Kramer [00:48:33]:
I’m Jewish, too.
Coralyn Jewel [00:48:34]:
And I went, I know I told you that. I said, you’re Jewish, you lived in La and our cross, we just never crossed the right path. And now you’re married and taken, you see, what am I going to do?
Robbie Kramer [00:48:44]:
I remember on the first show yeah.
Coralyn Jewel [00:48:47]:
What did I say to you? I’m like, okay, great. You’re in Ukraine now, right, that was very aware. Yeah.
Robbie Kramer [00:48:51]:
Well, I had the same experience with Judaism. I was bar mitzvah and I had Tuesday Hebrew school and Sunday school, and I hated going to services and all that stuff. And I actually really like the Jewish religion. I think it’s one of the I do too open minded. You can argue about it. You can talk about it. They want you to argue about it. They want you.
Coralyn Jewel [00:49:14]:
Yes, I did, and I actually have returned back to it, but not by force exactly. My dad one day have you? My dad one day he called me, I was living in Sweden, and he said to me, good yontav, which means like, Happy New Year for those of you guys that are not Jewish listening. And I was like, and then you do this thing, it’s like where you repent your sins and you throw bread into the ocean to get rid of your sins. And I remember that I said to my know how’s synagogue today? And he goes, oh, no, I’m calling you from the La Jolla cliffs or whatever. In other words, he’s sitting on a cliff over the ocean. I go, you’re not in synagogue? And he goes, no. I realized today that I forced you and your brother so much to follow this that you didn’t, and therefore, had I not forced you, maybe you would have more of embraced the religion that we come from. And he’s right. And because he apologized, he kind of made me go back to it. But I don’t force my kids on anything. Same with like my son plays music and he has the opportunity to play in a band on stage, and he doesn’t want to. I’m not going to force you. When you want to, you want to. When you don’t, you don’t. If you make a mistake, you’re going to learn from your mistakes. We know I’ve made, so but don’t force totally, yeah.
Robbie Kramer [00:50:20]:
My wife, when we came to, got.
Coralyn Jewel [00:50:23]:
A wife, damn it, I’m going to give you shit like that. Forever. What?
Robbie Kramer [00:50:30]:
She grew up like Russian Orthodox. I mean, that’s the main religion in Ukraine or Eastern Orthodox, I guess you say. Yeah. And she know the religion never made sense to her. It was just not something that she was. And her family wasn’t very religious. But when she started learning about Judaism, she wanted to convert. So she’s been taking classes every Wednesday and I attend the classes and it’s really interesting and it’s given me more of an appreciation of the religion now.
Coralyn Jewel [00:50:58]:
That it’s not forced on me ever. I think that’s an like, what’s the latest? India has taken away access to porn. Right. I think that’s like the country that hi India is like the number that’s the one thing they’re like born to work on computers and they go incognito and end a discussion. And my number one on my social media platforms, my number one following when you break it down is India second turkey.
Robbie Kramer [00:51:24]:
There you go.
Coralyn Jewel [00:51:25]:
But they’re not allowed to have any access to porn.
Robbie Kramer [00:51:28]:
They just go in on a VPN. It’s no problem, right?
Coralyn Jewel [00:51:31]:
Of course they do. Yeah. It’s like sorry, but not to be like what do you call it when you’re like social stereotyping. But they are good at computers and no one can outbeat a black man playing basketball. I’m sorry, it’s just the truth. They kick ass and they can dance. Almost every black guy knows. And I’m sorry that they can dance. White boys and white girls sometimes can’t dance, but they can. I’m sorry. That’s just what it is. There was a man at the bar the other night, you and he was so hot dancing. And everybody was like, Why is he so good? And I said, because he’s gay. Gay men are good looking dancers. It’s not fair. And he could dance.
Robbie Kramer [00:52:16]:
Yeah, I’ve taken dance classes, dance lessons. I’m a good athlete, but I’m not a good dancer. And I’m okay.
Coralyn Jewel [00:52:25]:
You can learn to do to perfect anything. It doesn’t matter. But that’s true. We just talk about with this whole people saying, oh, the Indians are never they can’t watch porn. Listen, they figure it out a way. They figure that out. You tell them no, they’ll figure it out.
Robbie Kramer [00:52:40]:
So they’re the number one subscriber on.
Coralyn Jewel [00:52:43]:
They are my number one.
Robbie Kramer [00:52:44]:
Yeah, I’m sure most Turkey is number.
Coralyn Jewel [00:52:47]:
Two and Greece is my next following.
Robbie Kramer [00:52:51]:
Greece interesting. Wouldn’t expect that.
Coralyn Jewel [00:52:54]:
Like they break it down.
Robbie Kramer [00:52:55]:
Yeah. Well, speaking of that, where can people find you? This has been awesome, by the way, really.
Coralyn Jewel [00:53:02]:
Thank you. Thank you for having me. Sorry for my morning of delays and you know what we were dealing with this morning? Communication.
Robbie Kramer [00:53:09]:
Exactly.
Coralyn Jewel [00:53:10]:
Well, you’re a whole where can I be found? Easiest is my website. So my website is thecorlinjewel so it’s Coralyn Jewel.com. And on there that goes to my Instagram, which is Coralinejewel. My Twitter is sweetbluecj, but that’s why I say just go there because that connects you to my Facebook, Coral and Jewel. I think I have a YouTube. That’s Coral and Jewel. It leads you over to my website or to my podcast, which is The Embrace, hosted by Coral and Jewel. So everything from my click.
Robbie Kramer [00:53:39]:
Yeah, guys, go check it out. We did a fun podcast a while back.
Coralyn Jewel [00:53:44]:
Yes. I don’t know which episode that was, but it’s on there. I haven’t done my podcast in like, five months. I’ve taken a very long break.
Robbie Kramer [00:53:53]:
Well, let me know if you want to fire it back up. I’ll come back on. That’d be fun.
Coralyn Jewel [00:53:57]:
Yes, I’ll bring you back on for sure.
Robbie Kramer [00:53:59]:
And who do you coach exactly? Men, women, anyone?
Coralyn Jewel [00:54:05]:
I really have a mixture. So it’s not just men or just women or just couples. I really do have a mixture of people that will contact me. Either they are looking into the lifestyle or they are involved in the lifestyle and they’re having issues, or they’re involved in the lifestyle and one’s having an issue and one’s not. So sometimes they’ll come to me privately and be like, listen, my husband and I are in the lifestyle. I’m really happy. I can tell he’s not. And then I say, Well, I’m not going to coach you guys separately. Normally what I do is, if it’s a couple, I’ll bring them in together for one time, we go together and then separate, separate and then back together to analyze and see if that’s something I can help them with. So if anybody is looking at that.
Robbie Kramer [00:54:45]:
Kind of stuff, lifestyle, I didn’t know that existed. That form of counseling, that’s amazing. I feel like every couple in the lifestyle should hire you because why not?
Coralyn Jewel [00:54:59]:
I know that there’s other people that do lifestyle coaching or stuff, and I don’t claim to have I’m not a therapist, I’m not a psychologist, I don’t have a PhD. But I’ve always said, I don’t think that I can coach you on what it’s like to be coming out of a sexually abused relationship, because I’ve never been there or I’ve never been raped, I’ve never been molested, I’ve never had a drug addiction, I’ve never had an alcoholic addiction. How can I coach you on what it’s like to be in your shoes if I haven’t been in your shoes? And so that’s why I tell people I’ve been in the lifestyle as a married woman, as a single woman and dating. I’ve run a swingers club. I still run a swingers club. I’ve seen everything that there is to imagine, to see. And then in the adult world, I coach people that want to get into the adult industry. Why do you want to get into this industry? The pros, the cons, the legalities of it, and really give them the back end of the outcome and the risks that you’re taking and stuff like that.
Robbie Kramer [00:55:57]:
Yeah, well, that’s the thing. It’s like when you hire a coach you should hire someone that’s walked the path you’re looking to walk.
Coralyn Jewel [00:56:04]:
Don’t hire somebody because they’ve got eight PhDs and this is their master degrees, because they’re just behind a book.
Robbie Kramer [00:56:10]:
Exactly. Like, guys hire me for dating coaching because they’re fake nice guys, and they want to have all these sexual experiences, and they don’t know how to do it. They don’t know how to communicate. They don’t really know where to get started and how to get over their anxiety to talk to girls or some other sort of higher level anxieties, too. And it’s like they’ve tried therapy. Almost all of the guys who come to me for but the therapist. I remember looking for a therapist, and it was so hard to find anyone I could relate to because all these guys were just like total nerds, know?
Coralyn Jewel [00:56:47]:
Yeah, I was going to say when I did my podcast, when I would do my know some of therapists I had on there. So, for example, Dr. Lee Phillips. Okay, so Dr. Lee Phillips is openly know. He’s gay, he’s married, and he is perfect to counsel somebody in the same situation that he’s in because he has shown that he doesn’t give a know. And this is who he is. And he’s amazing, brilliant man, but he’s also brilliant that’s walked in the shoes. And then you’ve got like, La Kink shrink, and he specializes in the Kink community. People that can’t go to a therapist and know, I get off on electric play or wax play because the therapist goes, well, there’s something really wrong with you. We need to prescribe you a medication for that. You got to look for somebody who, in my opinion, has experience and walks in your shoes and is similar to you. And so that’s why I get a lot of mostly what comes to me is older couples. I’m coaching a couple right now. I’ve been for a while in Greece, actually. And she went about some things behind his back, and he found out, and he’s a hell of a man for not giving up on that relationship. And instead they came to me and said, how can you help us get through this? So find somebody that you guys can connect with, whatever it may be, but don’t listen to a therapist telling you there’s something wrong with you or whatever, because they don’t really know anything.
Robbie Kramer [00:58:13]:
You have to find someone relevant, which can be tough when you’re dealing with those sort of niche markets. That’s so cool. So, guys, go check out Coraline. Thanks so much for coming on.
Coralyn Jewel [00:58:25]:
Thanks for having me, Darlin. It was good chatting with you again.
Robbie Kramer [00:58:27]:
You too.
Coralyn Jewel [00:58:29]:
All right, thanks for having me. Now I have to go fight attorneys and everybody else, right?
Robbie Kramer [00:58:33]:
I hope you enjoyed this week’s episode. If you’re new to the show and digging our content, please leave us a five star review on itunes, Stitcher, YouTube, wherever you listen or watch but if you’re not really digging it, go ahead. Just don’t leave us any review at all. That’d be great. If you’re feeling a little bit stuck or you just want to optimize and step up your game, we’ve opened up a few spots in our inner confidence community. We’re accepting applications. If you want to join our select group of men and experience a radical power of accountability, cross everything off your sexual bucket list and just become a beast who gets more stuff done. To learn more and apply, go to start innerconfidence.com you.
